Wednesday, July 25, 2007

The War on Terror

Ivy League Civil Servants Wage War on Bad Guys

Al Qaeda in Iraq (bad guys) are now in Iraq and are associated with Al Qaeda (really bad guys) who are taking orders from Bin Laden (the baddest guy of all). Ninety percent of new infrastructure built for the Iraqis (good guys) lies in disrepair because of the extremists (bad guys). The Iraqis (good guys) are expressing their appreciation for the sacrifices the American people (cows to be milked) have made by establishing a human smuggling ring to bring large numbers of Middle Easterners (moms and dads seeking a better life) into the American southwest.

Al Qaeda (really bad guys) are holed up in northern Pakistan (our friend and ally) and sheltered by tribal groups (some bad guys but mostly women and children, who can’t be bad guys). Musharraf (good guy) is battling to keep his power in the midst of Pakistanis (see above) while he proceeds to bring on line a new nuclear reactor that will produce enough fuel to create fifty new fission weapons each year.

Hamas (bad guys) are kept in check by sending the better part of a billion dollars annually in food, housing, education, and medical benefits for their rapidly expanding population. Despite this Hamas (bad guys) waged war on Fatah (good guys) and took all of the weapons that Condi sent them. Tens of millions of dollars of additional weapons are being sent to Fatah (good guys) so that Hamas (bad guys) don’t take them.

Ahmedinejad (bad guy) moves closer to his nuclear ambitions and threatens to wipe Israel (cause of Middle East problems) off the map. Ahmedinejad (bad guy) sends engineered weapons into Iraq (good guys) in order to kill Western forces. The Iranian people (good guys) are unwilling or unable to object to Ahmedinejad (bad guy). They are waiting for us to stand up against their Persian/Islamic heritage and will then welcome us with open arms.

Sunday, July 22, 2007

RedState and Petraeus

Good God, I’ve been banned from RedState. Here’s what gets you censored these days:

"The enemy is extremism, we think..."

General Petraeus is probably a great man. But by the continuous references to ‘David’ in Presidential speeches, it is clear that he is being set up as the fall guy by the Bush Administration. You don’t get to be a four-star by being dumb, and the General surely sees the position that the President is putting him in.

The General has a duty to his Commander-in-Chief, but he also has a fiduciary duty to the American people. He has a family interest in not ending up as the fall guy for a failed strategy.

The stage is set for General Petraeus to break with the President and be the first to name the enemy. The enemy is Islam. It is not possible to negotiate with a faith that requires all non-believers to be either converted, subjugated, or killed. It hasn’t happened for 1400 years and its not going to happen now.

Maybe I'm crazy, more likely we're in trouble. History is watching General.

Friday, July 6, 2007


"I would never think someone would discriminate against me," she said. "I don’t have any bad feelings for black Americans, but I am not one of them. … I’m not a black American, I’m not a white American. I’m an Ethiopian."
-USAtoday article

$70 trillion in unfunded liabilities, growing by $3 trillion per year. Aggregate American home equity is $10 trillion. Credit ratings. Hungry urban populations. Pop.

The Second American Republic


1. The health, welfare, and safety of the general public are threatened by the current violence;
2. The United States of America shall remain committed to the principles of freedom, opportunity, and equality;
3. It must be recognized that the entitlement state in its current form has led to economic collapse and widespread suffering among and danger to the American people;


1. I, General Kehrmeyer, have assumed the role of the executive, legislative, and judicial branches of the government in accordance with the Presidential Directive of 2017. On behalf of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, I wish to express my gratitude to President O’Bama and his staff for their assistance with and commitment to a smooth transition.
2. Civil order shall be restored in accordance with General Order #3.
3. In preparation for the General Election to seat the 215th Congress, all Citizens owning lien-free real estate are invited to apply for a voting card. Voting cards shall be issued by County Recorders to prospective voters after checking their ownership and lien claims against the County tax database. No more than one voter card may be issued per parcel. Parcels with an assessed value of less than $100,000 in 2018 dollars shall not be eligible for voter cards.
4. Other than the property provision, voter eligibility shall be universal.

Those Citizens in need of food, medical care, or other basic life support services are invited to the nearest Regional Aid Distribution Center for registration and assistance.

May God continue to bless the United States of America.

Very Respectfully;

General Kehrmeyer

Monday, July 2, 2007

Friday Night

Praise for the Brick Oven:

"Thanks for the get-together on Friday. It was nice to see you all and the boys had fun. The pizza was fantastic. Now, here’s the thing. Just about anybody would say that it was good, even it if was a pile of dough with a tomato on top, just to be polite. I really mean it was great."

Basking in the glow.

Conduction is an OK way to cook pizza, it’s the method used when you throw a pizza in the oven. Everything gets heated up.

Convection is a better way to cook pizza if you’re in business because by moving the heated air across the pizza, thermal gradients are reduced and things cook quicker, making you more money.

But the best way to cook pizza is the old-world way. Radiation and convection to create a crisp outside and a moist inside. The energy bill to do this with electricity would price a business out of the market. But you can do it with trees from your own back yard in a brick oven.

Pez is not responsible if the wife takes away your chainsaw in a rage.